not good enough

ii sit here wondering what images play through your mind when you think of me.

suicidal thoughts cross my mind but ii can’t fathom such an end.

my heart beats rapidly laying here in the dark awaiting the sun like an eager child.

chills run through my body at the thought of every moment ii did not feel adequate.

my mental health at stake, going crazy with the poking and measuring that takes place.

no room to get to know my… my existence too bleak to matter.

inadequacy is my only companion in this lonely world where ii am trapped like an animal in the zoo.

in a world where ii am simply not good enough.

your words bring me no comfort. just guilt and shame.

why can’t ii simply be…

good enough?

my thoughts after midnight.

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