I sit at my desk everyday.
Telling students that they are worthy.
Worthy of that A that they strive so hard for.
Worthy of love from their parents, peers, significant others, the world.
Worthy of acceptance for who they truly are.
I comfort them in their darkest moments.
I cheer for them at their greatest achievements.
I push them forward when they don’t have the courage to push themselves.
Then I go home feeling like I have cheated them in life because I fill them with hallow words and half truths. Building students up, knowing that my efforts at times, feel in vain.
The world bound to knock them down. The next person ready to test them and suck all the fresh air that I just gave them.
I weep in my covers for those who aren’t going to make it despite all my efforts. Because those are the ones who I show up to work for.
Praying that all the little energy I put forth sheds enough light to help them grow and reach their potential… even if I’m the only one what see’s it.
I weep because everyday some new catastrophe shakes my foundation and tests my faith in these babies of mine, no matter how grown they are.
They are my babies and I fight for them each day knowing how much I want to give up.
But accepting the fact that no one gave up on me, so I refuse to do them an injustice.
So each day, one step at a time, I reach back and push another along.
Some days it feels like I have all 500 of them on my back at once.
But as I dry my eyes before they close, I smile and rest easy knowing that I have given my all that day.
For tomorrow is another day that I will keep fighting for my babies, leveling the playing field for them to become successful, even if they don’t want to.